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OTHER NEWS

Charles River Renamed Chuck River on Casual Friday

September 11, 2015 0

CHARLES RIVER- Late Thursday night, The Charles River announced that it will be renamed “The Chuck River” for Casual Friday. “We like to keep it…

Condom Fairy Not What Expected

March 20, 2014 0

WARREN TOWERS—A Warren resident is still traumatized after catching a glimpse of the Condom Fairy late last night, sources report. A visibly upset Vanessa Collins…

Everything Done Half-Assed Due To Upcoming Finals

December 2, 2013 0

SOUTH CAMPUS—Sources have confi

Snowy Sidewalk Finally Gets Plowed, Gains New Sexual Confidence

February 10, 2016 0

After a long few weeks covered with snow (the same as last winter), that one snowy sidewalk FINALLY got plowed. Her friends celebrated with her,…

Dining Halls Struggling to Find New Interesting Names for the Same Piece of Dry Chicken…

February 23, 2018 0

THE DINING HALLS – Last Thursday, the heads of Warren, West, and Bay State dining halls conducted an emergency meeting to brainstorm new creative names…