CJ Zachara (COM '21)

CJ is a sophomore in COM studying Journalism. He is from Maplewood, New Jersey.

BUPD HQ—A squad of frat bros discovered and shut down a raging office party at the BUPD headquarters last Friday night. The Inter Fraternity Council sent a group of representatives to investigate the scene at 33 Harry Agganis Way around 11:30 p.m.

“They weren’t trying to bust our parties,” said Brother Brad (QST ‘19), “so we figured they must be up to something.”

The frat bros reported they had not been bothered all night despite throwing bangers across Allston. The parties were going strong, but the lack of police presence was alarming.

Brother Chad (CGS ‘19) issued the officers their first warning after hearing “Free Bird” blasting from inside the office. Moments later, another case of Natty Light and a handle of Rubinoff were seen being carried in from the back of a squad car. That’s when the boys decided it was time to barge in and shut it down.

Officers inside were said to be playing flip cup and doing keg stands. BUPD Chief Kelly Nee met the frat bros at the door to talk down the situation.

“There was no underage drinking going on inside at all,” said BUPD Chief Kelly Nee. “Freshman weren’t allowed in this week.”

Brother Chad voiced his concern about the drinking habits of the officers on campus.

“The heavy drinking we see from this department is a disgrace,” said Chad. “Those officers are just lucky we busted ‘em before someone got hurt.”

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