NEWS
Breaking: Bunion Reporter While Headline Writing Stroke Has
AMBULANCE—A Bunion suffered reporter stroke a writing while this article. He continued his with article even suffering while. The dedicated …
LIFESTYLE
Trendy! StuVi2 Residents Decorate Windowsill With Empty Bottles of…
STUVI2—Most StuVi residents line their window sills with empty bottles of alcohol, but these trendy suitemates have decided to break …
OPINION
Greenline Conductor Wonders, Why Avoid Hitting Slow Students?
BU CENTRAL—Green line conductor Richard Grimes feels it is unnecessary for him to avoid hitting all of the students who …
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OTHER NEWS
Mugar Librarian Shushes Fire Alarm
MUGAR LIBRARY—Sources report that Mugar head librarian, Chauncy Newton, responded to a fire alarm that was set off on Thursday afternoon by loudly shushing it…
BU Today Introduces New “BU Tomorrow” Feature
WEST CAMPUS—In the face of an increasingly well-informed and hard to please readership, BU’s official news publication BU Today will be expanding the scope of…
Guy Who Brought Greek Yogurt Licking Lid Real Weird
CAS—Many sources have told The Bunion that Jared Commit (CAS’ 20) constantly eats greek yogurt in class, distracting other students. Students who are in Intro…
Gluten Glad it Got Rid of You, Too.
WARREN DINING—In light of the many new age dieting fadsthat have excited the country, many people have decided to take on a glutenfree appetite. Sources…
Board of Trustees Votes to Divest From Fossil Fuels, Invest in Blockbuster
QUESTROM—Sources have confirmed that the members of the Board of Trustees voted yesterday to divest from harmful fossil fuels, instead choosing to funnel their resources…