Photoshopped by Jacob Cohen (COM '22)
Caroline Koehl (CAS '22)

Caroline Koehl is a second year student from Minneapolis, MN. She is studying International Relations and Environmental Analysis & Policy.

FITNESS AND RECREATION CENTER– FitRec employees have reported that the Rhett statue has left his post at his bench on Bay State Road and was spotted at the gym.

Employees say that he has been there non-stop for the past week, and that he traded in his signature bronze hockey jersey in favor of a sleeveless hoodie reading ‘no pain, no gain.’

Student Chester Park (QST ’22) is one eyewitness to the Rhett statue’s recent efforts at FitRec.

“Every time I’ve been here this week, that Rhett statue has been here on the exact machine I want to use. I want to use the bench press? He’s on there. I want to use the leg curl machine? He’s on there. One time, I just wanted to use a single kettlebell, but somehow he was using all of them at once.”

Madison Russell (COM ‘20) also had an encounter with the Rhett statue at FitRec.

“He’s the worst. One time, I wanted to get on the rowing machine, but he was already on it. When I turned around to get on a different one, he was somehow also on that machine. I don’t know how that’s even possible.”

Amidst increasing complaints from the student population surrounding the Rhett statue’s lack of gym etiquette, BU administration has issued a press release defending his actions.

“While we regret that students may have been denied time on FitRec machines, it is important for fostering our school’s spirit and unity that the Rhett statue remains jacked. Thus, we support the Rhett statue’s continued monopoly over all FitRec machines. If our mascot isn’t #swole, how are we even supposed to compete with that fierce Eagle at BC?”

At press time, the Rhett statue was seen taking new mirror selfies for his Tinder profile in the locker room.

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