I <3 Uber. My wallet doesn’t, but I do. And you know what, I think Uber loves me, too; I’ve gotten some pretty great advice from the Uber drivers I have met. Everytime they pour some wisdom on me, I write it down in my silly little Notes app and refer to it when I am desperate for help. This knowledge, however, isn’t meant for the confinements of a Note titled “Uber Speaking Facts”. It is something to be shared. So, here you go: some Uber Driver Life Lessons from the archives.

Kenny on relationships: “I’ve never visited my girlfriend after midnight. You know, you really shouldn’t visit a significant other after midnight. That’s gonna give them the wrong message.” 

Gina on college: “I went to Northeastern. Good school, if you didn’t know. I got a 4.0 in college. Both of my kids are at Northeastern now. They both have a 3.75. Smart kids, smart kids. 3.75 isn’t a 4.0, though. Remember that. 3.75 is definitely not a 4.0.”

Felipe on fashion: “I think a fedora makes an outfit much better. It seals the deal. If you need something more, if your outfit isn’t enough, put on a fedora.” 

Froido on religion: “I drive with my rosary beads in my car. God knows I need the help. Everyone should think about having rosary beads in their car even if they aren’t religious because they’re the most you can do to not get in a crash.” 

Rain on sexism: “When a big man and a little woman get in the car, I can never see the little woman. Once they leave I see her getting out, of course. But I don’t know why I don’t notice her sooner. I just don’t know.” 

There you have it, folks. A few pieces of advice that are sure to help. As long as I am draining my pockets getting Ubers and writing down every word these lovely drivers say, you will be suited up with higher understanding.

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