Photoshopped by Lauren Kelmar (COM '21).
Samantha Dilsheimer (COM '22)

Sam is a junior from Philadelphia studying Film and TV. She likes Diet Coke for the taste

So you’ve been talking to this guy all week. He asks for your snapchat…which is weird, because he’s not a high school sophomore, but you let it go. After all, he could be *the one*.

You start chatting him up.  Everything’s going good. You’re young, you’re hot, you wear a mask when you go to Trader Joe’s… you check all the boxes. But suddenly… you get a snap from him. THE snap. The snap no one wants to receive. 

“I tested positive,” he writes. Your heart drops. You haven’t met up yet, so that’s a relief…but on the other hand, now there’s no chance of getting plowed this weekend. Still, you can keep talking, right? Your personality is interesting enough. 

You send some quirky and cute pics of you with maybe a filter or two and then… radio silence. 

So weird, right? At first you think, oh maybe he’s just on a social media detox, which like, is totally understandable. But then, you check your tinder matches, and POOF! He’s gone. 

So weird. What a dick. I can’t believe he did this. Did he actually test positive? Or was this kind of sick, cruel joke? I thought we had something real. 

I thought we had something real, he might not even have something real. 

Leave a Reply