A recent survey revealed that our country is even more divided than we thought…and no, it’s not because of U.S. politics or Facebook’s algorithms. Rather, this mysterious divide has to do with Jack Harlow.

For those unfamiliar with Jack Harlow, he is an American rapper and songwriter from Shelbyville, Kentucky. The state has borne some of our best and brightest, from JLaw to George Clooney. Most of these stars are quick to hide their upbringing, but not Mr. Harlow. Maybe his loyalty to one of the worst states in America is one of the things that makes him…sexy? 

“He’s so hot and I cannot figure out why,” jelly_fish666 on Reddit explains. “Is it his style or is it the way he handles himself? Does anyone else feel this way?”

Apparently, other people do feel this way. It makes sense—Jack Harlow has the energy of Post Malone’s younger brother who was once into sports, but stopped when he got to college.  

“I had to take Machine Gun Kelly out of my roster of guys to fangirl over because he was being problematic,” said an anonymous* source. “I needed someone else that didn’t really make sense. Jack Harlow just fit perfectly.”

The hashtag “JackHarlowHot” has only one post on Instagram, and yet thirst for the man with a Kentucky chain is sweeping the nation (well, half of it). Exactly 5 in 10 women believe Jack Harlow is, in fact, hot. But half of those 5 believe it secretly (so, yes, only 2 and a half women out of ten are honest about their feelings towards Jack Harlow). 

The owner of the only Jack Harlow thirst fan page, @jackhotlow, offers insight into this strange phenomenon. “My attraction developed in the way that one might have Stockholm Syndrome, or enjoy salt & vinegar chips—I was exposed to him so much that eventually I started thinking he was hot. And I had to do something about it, so I started the fan page.”

The owner of @jackhotlow was discovered by her boyfriend when he sleuthed with Instagram’s “also recommended” feature. They broke up afterwards—not because she was being disloyal, but because they couldn’t agree on what exactly makes Jack Harlow attractive. The question of Jack Harlow’s hotness has torn apart relationships, friend groups, and even families.

“Why is Jack Harlow hot? Well, it really changes day to day,” said the anonymous source. “I think that might be why it’s so hard to pin down.” 

It might also be hard to pin down because—hot take—he isn’t?? But maybe tomorrow I’ll think he is. Crazier things have happened. Like George Clooney being from Kentucky.

*Names have been changed and/or not specified because none of these young women want to be ousted from their respective societies for their attraction to Mr. Harlow.

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