Photoshopped by Jacob Cohen (COM '22)
Sam Vatalaro (COM '22)

Sam is originally from Saratoga Springs, NY majoring in Film & TV, and, well, you know what they say.

MUGAR LIBRARY- As another semester began in earnest, BU students remember in solemn honor an excuse remembered as “irreplaceable” and “life-saving.”

Students frantically doing work on the third floor of Mugar on Sunday evening on the all commiserated on the loss of the best excuse for slacking off: “nothing due this early in the semester will count that much anyway.”

“It was a catch-all,” Henry Meullihan (CAS ’21) said. “It covered everything: homework assignments, quizzes, even tests. It….it almost seems like I could still use it, if I just believe hard enough. I could totally still use this excuse! There’s no way I have to actually write this six page paper in the next twenty minutes!”

Others in the library disagreed, saying that the “beginning of the year” excuse hadn’t failed them so far. However, it was obvious that the excuse’s time had come. While some celebrated it’s good, long life, others, processing the loss differently, were furious.

“It’s not fair,” Sara Ryu (SAR ’22) yelled before being shushed. “We hardly got to know it! I don’t care if the time we had together was short, it was meaningful, and I miss that excuse!”

Others in Mugar seemed less concerned.

“Don’t cry because it’s over,” said Josh Broelin (COM ’20), who was lounging around and eating Cheezits while watching the frantic workings of the people around him. “Smile because it happened. That excuse has helped me for four straight years. Is it sad when it leaves you? Of course, but you have to cherish the time you had together. Think of all the things that excuse helped you procrastinate, and remember that it’s better to have excused and lost, than to never have excused at all.”

Broelin, clearly accepting his loss, was later seen sitting in as a mediator on a support group for students still wrestling with their emotions about the lost excuse.

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