Traveling has become much more difficult due to quarantine. Maybe you had a holiday road trip you were really looking forward to. Or maybe you had to cancel an extravagant ten-day European vacation, you whiny little trust fund baby!

But not to worry! Here at The Bunion, we have the perfect solution. Now, you can get to your vacation by plane… the astral plane, that is!

The process is very simple and 100% safe!  (Okay maybe like 35% safe, but it’s still 100% more fun than staring out the window of your Warren dorm room).

All you have to do is lie down, close your eyes, and allow your astral self to fly across the Pacific Ocean to the beautiful beaches of Hawai’i. You can even bring your friends along, by including a meetup stipulation in your pre-astral projection mantra!

(Warning! Possible side effects of astral project include: dissociation, flatulence, the opening of your third eye, haunting by interdimensional demons, etc.)

Through the power of astral projection, you can explore this tropical paradise without spreading any germs. And this method of travel hardly impacts the quality of your vacation at all! Except for swimming. And eating. And tanning. And being visible to anyone else that you encounter during your trip.

You can see all the fun attractions, but the experience really ends there.

As for those of you unable to astral project because your chakras aren’t aligned…That’s okay.  Just change your Zoom background to a sunny beach.  It won’t give you a tan, but at least your classmates will be jealous.

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