MANHATTAN—The nation’s employers unanimously agreed with an online survey saying that Boston University alumni are among the most datable alumni.
“Absolutely,” said Lou Burges, a 42 year-old regional manager at Microsoft. “BU alumni just have an unbeatable combination of charisma, intellect and humor that you won’t find with anyone else.”
“Not to mention, they could all be CEOs of the looks department, if you catch my drift,” Burges continued as he adjusted his tie and gazed wistfully out of his office towards his intern, Rebecca Stoll (CAS ‘10).
Employers also said that BU alumni would definitely be the most likely to say yes to a second date, and they would “of course” be more interested in committed relationships than alumni from other universities.
“I can safely say that BU alumni will give you what you’ve been missing in your love life,” said Howard Vecsey, a senior executive at Alliance Bank. “They’re proof that an Ivy League degree won’t get you everything.”
Vecsey then retreated to his office and rang for his assistant Katie Delilah (SMG ’09) to “talk about her overtime hours.”
At press time the spouses of the surveyed employers could not be reached for comment.