BOSTON, MA – After entering the perfectly decorated vegan cafe on a Thursday night, sophomore Clara Choka ordered a falafel bowl with baked chickpeas. Choka, excited for the bowl, began to eat it faster and faster. The person working at Life Alive said, “Be careful with those chickpeas, they get stuck in people’s throats a lot!” Choka responded, “I will be fine, who could ever choke on a chickpea?”
A few minutes later, Choka’s voice began to change into a Kermit the frog-like sound. “I think I’m choking!” Choka’s friend did not take her seriously because she was laughing the entire time.
A few minutes later, after chugging an alarmingly large amount of water, Choka sounded like Miss Piggy. This is when she decided to leave the cafe and return to her dorm. After leaving the cafe, Choka waited 15 minutes for the BU bus. According to Choka, “The app said it was only one minute away!”
While coughing on the bus, Choka received many glaring stares. She said, “I’m just choking. I don’t have COVID, don’t worry!” Soon after, Choka was shoved off the bus two stops early.
When arriving at her dorm, Choka went to her minifridge to get her Brita, but her roommate had emptied it without refilling it. Choka then knocked on her neighbors’ door and talked to them in her Miss Piggy-like voice.
Choka asked, “Do you have any waterrrrrr?” They did not have any.
A minute later, Choka looked around her room to find throat lozenges. She swallowed one and the lozenge got stuck along with the chickpea.
Later on, Choka called BU Health Services and told them she was choking. The person working asked if she could put her on a brief hold. Ten minutes later the woman on the phone stated, “Unfortunately, we cannot help you today. I would recommend calling an ambulance.” Choka responded, “It’s ok I will just Uber it’s cheaper.”
After arriving at the emergency room, Choka was told that she must wait three hours. “But I’m choking on a chickpea!” After waiting for two hours, someone bumped into Choka and the chickpea was finally dislodged.
Choka has now become synonymous with being the girl that choked on the chickpea. When telling her friends about it they laughed instantly. After swearing off chickpeas and Life Alive, Choka now spends her Tuesday and Thursday afternoons in the cafe, now rebranded as Life Unalive, enjoying baked chickpeas.
To quote Kelly Clarkson, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”