WARREN—This Sunday the Howard Thurman Center hosted a workshop for freshman and others seeking to break up with their high school sweethearts over Thanksgiving break.

“This is a topic that we think is really important to have an open discussion about. Breaking up over Thanksgiving break has a stigma around it that we’re trying to break down.”

At the meeting, everyone received a Mad Lib style break up speech, so that they had a general idea of what direction to take with the speech.

“Mine reads ‘I need to talk to you about the way you’ve been (v.) flying. It really bothers me when you (v.) sing the ABC’s and (v.) pet your dog, not to mention your (n.) piggy bank,’” said Ken Carter, a participant in the workshop, “Oh, this is supposed to be like actual problems we have with them?”

Contradictory to the general theme of the workshop, the HTC was also giving out free condoms because any workshop that is vaguely related to sex at Boston University gives out free condoms.

“Tis’ the season,” began Joe Sarnoff, leader of the HTC, “for crushing hearts! Now I don’t mean to discredit your break up by shaving it down to it’s basics, but let’s take a look at this power point, which will break down breaking up to its basics.”

At press time, the Career Development Center was offering open resume hours, only to be ignored yet again.

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