MYLES—That guy who lives down the hall thinks you guys should totally jam sometime, sources confirmed yesterday evening.

“I thought I heard guitar,” he said, sticking his head into your open dorm room while you were playing last night. “Sounds nice. How long have you been playing?”

After making it known that he also plays guitar, the guy then initiated ten minutes of conversation that consisted of dry, uninteresting questions that boring guitarists usually ask, sources say. “I have mine here, too. We should totally jam sometime,” the guy added.

“What is that, an Epiphone?”

That guy, who wears a guitar pick necklace to make sure that everyone knows that he loves music, then began namedropping his favorite bands, shows he’s been to, and shows that he’s already bought tickets for throughout the rest of the semester before turning the conversation to his love of pop-punk music.

“This is gonna be a really good semester for live music. I heard Motion City Soundtrack is coming in November. I’m so pumped.” Said the guy, who later mentioned that he’s been looking for people to play with and is thinking of starting a band. “Do you know any drummers?”

Throughout the unbearably dull ten minutes, it became very clear that you and this guy are extremely different people with no other common ground beyond the fact that you play the same musical instrument. “What kind of strings do you use?” he asked, after a noticeable lull in the conversation.

Witnesses say that after exhausting his reserve of talking points on the subject of music, that guy left to go finish studying for his mid-term. “I got some stuff to do, but let me know if you wanna jam sometime,” he said, while wearing the t-shirt of a band that you hate.

“I’m always down!”

At press time, neither one of you actually expects to ever play music together.

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