SED—Hardin Coleman, the current dean of the School of Education, is stepping down after gaining too much respect and being treated too fairly.

“I just couldn’t deal with how nice people were to me,” said Hardin Coleman. “When I walked down the halls, people bowed. Even the faculty members. It was just too much.”

Another claim states that Coleman decided to step down after discovering the Pink Floyd Song ‘Another Brick in the Wall’.

“I was walking to class one day and I overheard Dean Coleman blaring Pink Floyd in his office,” said Ashley Zinger (SED ’18). “I didn’t think much of it until I heard him repeatedly sing the line ‘we don’t need no education’ over and over again.”

At press time, sources confirmed that the new dean of SED will be reincarnated from the hills of India

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