Cuffing season has officially begun, the time where every college student scrambles to enter a relationship that they can show off on Instagram and bring to family gatherings before a dramatic breakup in May. As the cold months, and another lockdown are approaching, you are going to want a bae to keep you warm for the winter.
Quarantine and zoom interactions have made a lot of us rusty, drastically decreasing our flirting skills, but never fear! The Pinky Toe has a new, revolutionary tip for cuffing season- start calling everyone your boyfriend until someone goes along with it.
We’ve all been there: you’re on the phone with your family when they ask you the dreaded question – “have you been seeing anyone?” Instead of having to admit that you haven’t had a conversation with a human male since One Direction was around, just say yes. The boy who held the door open for you the other day? He’s your boyfriend. The cute cashier at Tatte? Your boyfriend. Your hot TA? Been dating for months now. Now you can brag about your mysterious man, instead of having to hear about how your bitch cousin Bethanny got engaged to her high school sweetheart – finally!
Have you been scourning Tinder and Bumble, trying to find a decent guy without a photo of him holding a fish in his profile? With our tip, you won’t need to have any more one word conversations with Connor from Sigma Ligma Pi. Just download Uber Eats, and call the man who delivered your Chinese Takeout your new boo. Sure, he’s fifty and likely married, but go for it! He brings you food and then you never see him again – sounds downright DREAMY!
Cuffing is an intricate game, one that requires a robust skillset and determination. Getting and maintaining a boyfriend during these times are extraordinarily difficult, which is why you need to skip the flirting and subtlety entirely. This DIY hack will help you become a professional cuffer in no time.