Recently, CFA student Christopher Flannery (CFA ‘20) was kicked out of the music department’s piano performance program for laughing during a lesson on classical composer Claude Debussy.

“Dude, his name’s just funny, my guy,” said the expelled Flannery “I seriously don’t know why they had to take such aggressive action.”

The fateful moment occurred last Tuesday. His classical piano class was discussing different pentatonic scales, so Professor Jamie Packer led the discussion by talking about Debussy’s “Deux Arabesques.”

But upon Packer’s first utterance of “Debussy,” the degenerate vermin Flannery let out a small snicker, catching Packer’s attention.

“What is this, middle school?” said one of his classmates. “Like you put in all this work to get into one of the finest music schools in the world but you can’t abstain from laughing at ‘Debussy?’”

Packer then showed the sheet music for Debussy’s first Arabesque in E Major, and made the mistake of uttering the phrase, “If you look at the music, it’s clear Debussy requires very specific fingering.” Upon hearing this, the shameful fuckhead Flannery burst out laughing.

“Is there something funny, Mr. Flannery?” Packer asked the anthropomorphic cumstain.

“Lol you said ‘Fingering Debussy’ ahahahahahahaha,” the parentless shitsack Flannery said, to which Packer responded promptly by kicking him the fuck out of class.

Packer would eventually contact the Dean of the College of Fine Arts to expel Flannery, the disdainful disgrace who deserves a ninth circle of hell all to himself.

“As soon as I heard this, I was flooded with anger and confusion,” Dean John Hendricks said. “We don’t accept bullshit like this here. If you laugh at a goddamn joke from Family Guy, you should be deported, never mind expelled.”

Since this development, no music school is willing to accept the terrible horrible no-good very bad dickhead Flannery, and we wish him no luck in his continuing search for a music degree. The CFA has also contracted each BU Shuttle driver to try and run him over while he’s still in Boston.

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