Last night the clock striked bazoomba for 13-year-old Eric Boner. After uncovering his parent’s secret DVD collection, Boner decided to judge a film by its poster and watch the most important Tyra Banks vehicle of all time, Coyote Ugly. After one glance at Piper Perabo, Boner had a realization. An awakening, if you will. Maybe even an epiphany.
After seeing a singular woman in a leather cropped blouse, Boner became a staunch feminist.
“We gotta protect these people,” urged Boner in an interview with The Pinky Toe. “They give more than they receive and that needs to change.”
Doubling down on his activism, Boner mailed our staff members magazine clippings of the U.S. women’s volleyball team from the ESPN body issue with words like “empowered” and “gifted” squeezed between circled photos of breasts and butts.
Taking to reddit, Boner found a community of like-minded individuals who share his passion for women’s rights.
“My online friend, @squirtmommy1008, said it best when he posted ‘big naturals deserve paid maternity leave.’ This guy just gets it!” Said Boner, who was wearing Jennifer’s Body merchandise during our interview with him. “Next week my friends @tit4tit and @tonguestuff_only69 are going to the local library to make sure that they have feminist films available. We can’t educate the world until we educate our respective communities. That means making feminist content accessible to everyone.”
Boner proceeded to fax over his “feminist film” list to our offices. The list was accompanied by a note that read “beautiful, beautiful, beautiful girls.” His list was…interesting to say the least. See his picks below:
- Knocked Up (2007)
- All About Steve (2009)
- She’s All That (1999)
- Rough Night (2017)
- MILF (2018)
- The Wolf of Wall Street (2013)