It all started on one fateful afternoon.

Snow was falling onto the ground and the cold air hit my skin from a window propped open. As I was caressed by the outside, I expected my body to respond. Awaiting a chill down my spine, a shiver at the very least; I was shocked. 

I became enveloped in a heat like no other. My brow began to sweat, my hair felt sticky at the nape of my neck. I quickly began to shed layer after layer, but to no avail. Why was I, a spry eighteen year old woman so hot? Could it be the furnace blowing heavily to my right? Or the twelve layers of cashmere turtlenecks I had donned? No. There is only one reason. 


This conclusion rang in my head, sending alarm throughout my body. I sprinted into my dorm room bathroom and began to nest inside a stall. My breathing was irregular, I panted in panic. There was only one way to find my truth. 

I plunged my hand to the deepest part of my innards, feeling around helplessly. My fingers scrambled to find purchase on anything. But I was left with emptiness. My eggs had left me. 

I cried out in despair. What had I done wrong? Each one of my eggs was like a friend to me. I had supported them through each one of their triumphs and tribulations. I attended each birthday party, became a shoulder to cry on for every heartbreak, I even was present at all of their creations. We had been one since the beginning of time. 

Yet here I was, alone. Taunted by the dirtied pads and tampons in the container to my right.  How could I ever enter into a bathroom again? My eggs– my family, had abandoned me. 

How will I ever make an omelet again? 

EDIT: nevermind guys, I got my period.

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