The Local Good Guy Awards took place last Friday. In a fan upset, the highly prestigious and coveted Ally of the Year award was awarded to your ex-boyfriend for his frequent liking of feminist satire content on Instagram. 

Because of all your recommendations, your ex proved his worthiness as a female ally after following a grand total of 3 feminist satire pages. Following the win, your ex-boyfriend was interviewed on his reaction to winning the award:“Until I met  (y/n), I never knew women could be so funny. I believe in equal rights and everything but I never thought feminism was something we could joke about. Also, by reading all this feminist satire I can finally understand what the typical female experience is like.” 

Along with the award title, the winner receives an all expense paid 7-day trip to a matriarchal tribe in the Amazon Rainforest to expand his perspective. Additionally, he will be receiving DVD collector editions of The Rosie O’Donnell Show and Reba.

Here is a list of other award winners of the night:

Nicest Guy – Gas station clerk who let you buy cigarettes when you were drunk and didn’t have your ID

Best Himbo – Frat bro who decided not to drop his women and gender studies class

The One That Got Away – Guy reading Eat, Pray, Love on the Green line

Standard Setter – Your grandpa who paid for your entire meal and drinks at applebees

Best Dressed – That one bisexual guy in your screenwriting class

Hottest Guy– Chester Cheetah

Most Respectable Guy – Guy who left you alone after you barked at him at the bar 
Congratulations to all of our Good Guys! Once again, when it comes to women’s rights there’s nobody killing it like men are!

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