WARREN TOWERS—Sources report that a seventeen year old freshman is trying to convince other students that he voted by making his own “I voted” sticker.
“I voted I swear,” said Jake Dollert (COM’ 20). “If you don’t believe me, just look at the sticker on my shirt. Question two was so hard, but I think the answer was B!”
It was confirmed that the sticker was fake when multiple students saw Dollert with the sticker.
“I called Jake out on the fake sticker when I saw him walking in the rain,” Margaret Pierce (CAS’ 19) stated. “The marker ink from the sticker he made was running down his clothes when it was pouring outside. He wasn’t fooling anyone.”
Jake went to CVS and bought red and blue markers to try and make the sticker seem more real, but in an effort to save money, he did not buy waterproof markers.
At press time, Jake Dollert admitted that he was just in it for the trend, and actually had no opinions about who should be president.