Are midterms getting you down? Have you been missing some of that oomph in your life? Is Adderall just not cutting it anymore? Here’s a list of 10 unhinged rumors you can spread right now, just to spice things up.
- Ellen Degeneres came out as straight.
You know it’s not true. I know it’s not true. Who cares? Spread it.
- All frats are now requiring pledges to carry around a vape at all times in case brothers need a rip.
This one is true. 😉
- Katy Perry is speaking at Questrom Graduation.
Questrom kids will fall for this one as hard as they fell for trickle-down economics.
- Sunset Cantina will accept your fake ID.
Getting your fake rejected at sunset cantina is basically a hub requirement. You’re just helping them along.
- There was a civil war between North and South Dakota and now it’s just called “South.”
This one is extra versatile because North and South Dakota actually aren’t real.
- The “covid tests” we’ve all been taking are actually STD tests.
Gonorrhea. Syphilis. Chlamydia. Choose your fighter. Look, there’s a reason frat parties always lead to positive spikes.
- Healthway offers medical marijuana prescriptions.
Just go in and ask! It’s no big deal. If they tell you otherwise, persist.
- The milk in the Fenway dining hall is laced with coke.
That’s why the cgs kids are like that.
- AOC wears a Rhett costume in the bedroom.
This one is also true. Trust me.
- Martin Luther King Jr’s terrier card is hidden in the walls of the CAS Think Tank.
Rumor has it that BU won’t give it back to his family no matter how many times they ask. He is a BU alum. Don’t you forget that.